


I'm tired

by HappyKonny



Category: Septiplier - Fandom, Youtube RPF, youtube - Fandom
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Hurt/Comfort, Implied Sexual Abuse, Implied/Referenced Physical Abuse, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Past Abuse, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred, Suicide Attempt, happy end
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-30
Updated: 2017-05-17
Packaged: 2018-10-25 22:35:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 15,835
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10773870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HappyKonny/pseuds/HappyKonny
Summary: Jack hadn't thought that someone else would be in the forest this late at night.He wouldn't have ever imagined that he'd talk someone out of suicide either.But he most definitely wasn't prepared to not only help a stranger out of killing himself, but also fall in love with said stranger.





	1. Chapter 1

Jack always loved late evening walks, especially through nature. Sure, now that he was living in LA, there wasn't that much nature to walk through anymore, but he could always drive out and find some place nice. Especially since he discovered that, depending on the time, even the parks in LA were full or had drunks and drug addicts in them. So, on a beautiful evening like today, were Jack needed to clear his head, he had gone out and driven to the closest forest he could find.  
His car parked, standing alone near the forest, Jack started to wander along a path he found. It looked like the forest was often walked through, there were definite paths to walk along. Jack was kind of glad for it, this way he wouldn't get completely lost if he didn't pay attention to where he was going in the dark.

Jack let his hands rest inside the pocket of his hoodie, to keep the fresh breeze away from freezing his hands, and let his mind wander. He thought about his YouTube career, his 15 million subscribers, his friends and family. He had moved away a few years ago now, away from his family, from Ireland. He still loved his home dearly, and he missed the regular rain. But he liked living here as well. His reasons for moving that he had told were, that he would be closer to conventions and more fans, and he needed a change of scenery. And it wasn't all a lie. He had wanted a new start, to get away from everything.  
He let out a sigh, looking around. He had wandered for quite some time now, and he was glad that the moon was full and shining. The leafs of the trees disturbed the moonlight, letting shadowy patterns appear on the path. He could hear a river nearby, the water rushing by rather loudly. He could see the ground falling to the left, which would explain why a river would become tempestuous.

Looking ahead, Jack spotted a stone-bridge, going over he river. It was easy to see, thanks to the moonlight being able to shine undisturbed on it. There were no trees there after all, that could block the light. He decided to go to the bridge and look out over the water, before making his way back. He couldn't spend the whole night here after all, but he wanted to see the water at least. Maybe he could come back here some time, he probably would, knowing himself.  
Approaching the bridge, Jack could see a person. Stopping in his tracks, his eyes widened. The person was standing on the railing of the bridge, the tips of his shoes looking over it, towards the water. That man, Jack realized, was going to _kill himself_.

Taking a deep breath, Jack slowly approached the bridge. He didn't know that person, he had no idea who that guy was, but he couldn't just stand there and let someone kill themselves. He had to at least _try_ and safe that person, talk him out of it. Jack arrived at the bridge, his feet touching the stone. Now he could get a better look at the person as well.  
He was pretty sure it was a man, broad shoulders -which were slumped- wearing a red and black flannel, the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. He wore normal blue jeans and some sneakers. His hair was similar cut to Jack's, short at the sides, but longer at the top. His hair was definitely longer than Jack's though, but it was also dyed. Dark blue by the looks of it, but already fading and showing dark roots.  
"'scuse me", Jack spoke up, when he was a few steps away from the man on the railing. He was obviously startled by the sudden voice, turning slightly to look at Jack. Dark eyes, hidden behind glasses, found Jack's bright blue eyes. Even in this darkness, with barely any light from the moon, could Jack see dark circles under the man's eyes, the sad gaze.  
"What?", the man spoke, his voice was deep, but his words were quiet, the tone sad. It made Jack frown in worry, feeling sad just from hearing how sad the other was.  
"Don't kill yerself..", Jack had no idea what else he should say. He didn't know that guy after all, but he knew no one should kill themselves. He wanted to help that man.  
"Why not? I have no reason to live anyways...", the man spoke, turning his gaze away from Jack again. He looked back out over the water, into the river, which sparkled thanks to the reflected moonlight.  
"There must be a reason! What got ya up there? Wanna talk 'bout it?", Jack was slightly panicked, he had no idea what to do, what he could say to the other to make him change his mind.

"Why would you care? I'm just some stranger, no one who'd be missed", was the reply Jack got. His voice was so full of sadness, it hurt Jack's heart.  
"Well, 'm Jack. Twenty-six years an' livin' life in LA", Jack introduced himself. "How about'chu?". He hoped he could just talk with the stranger, get him to open up a little and _not_ kill himself.  
The man stayed silent for a while, before he sighed. "I'm Mark", he finally said. When he didn't add anything after a minute or two, Jack sighed quietly to himself.  
"So Mark, we're not strangers anymore. Why not tell me 'bout yer troubles?", Jack tried, again, to have Mark open up to him. At least a little. Just enough so that Jack could help.  
Mark looked at Jack again, silent. A few moments passed, before his gaze fell on the ground again.  
"I'm.. I'm tired. So, so tired..", he said, his voice trembling ever so slightly. "All I do is hurt people... I'm- I'm a broken mess. A- a burden to- to everyone". His shoulders shook, tears gathering in his eyes. He rubbed fiercely at his eyes, shaking his head. He shuffled a little bit further away from Jack.  
In response, Jack took a step forward, afraid that Mark would fall. "Yer not broken. Yer no burden. 'm sure yer not hurtin' everyone", he said softly, trying to stay calm.  
"How would you know?", Mark asked, turning around. Now with his back to the river, Jack could see that Mark wore a T-shirt under his flannel, had tan skin and a stubbly beard.  
Jack smiled softly, trying to hide his fear for this stranger, someone he didn't know at all, and took another small step towards Mark. "I just feel like yer not. Yer surely a great person, Mark".

Mark shook his head, shifting away from Jack. If he moved much more, he'd fall. Tears ran over his cheeks, his whole being shaking a little. The longer Jack looked at him, the more he could see how _afraid_ Mark was.  
"Please Mark. Step down. Let's talk, a'right?", Jack took another, very small, step forward. He reached out his hand, offering it to Mark with a calm smile, hoping his voice didn't tremble too much.  
"Why do you care so much?", Mark's voice trembled, his eyes trained on Jack. He couldn't see a reason for Jack to care if he killed himself or not.  
"Why shouldn't I? 'm not a bad person, Mark", Jack was about to take another step, but when Mark noticed, he threatened with movements to go over the edge, making Jack freeze in place.  
"How about this", Jack could only think of one last thing, that could maybe get Mark to come down. At least for now. "Ya get down an' we go home. An' tomorrow we'll talk. And if I can't help ya in any way, then ya can come back 'ere". It was a stupid deal, letting a stranger come to his home just so that he wouldn't kill himself. But Jack felt the need to help Mark.

Mark seemed to think about that, his tears subsiding slowly. He sniffed, rubbing his running nose with the sleeve of his flannel. Jack carefully stepped closer to Mark, who didn't try to move back. His hand was in reach for Mark now, he just needed to take a step towards the bridge again. Towards safety.  
His eyes looked into Jack's, the calm smile on his face trying to reassure Mark. He took a few uneven, but somewhat deep, breaths, before he took a step towards Jack. He grabbed his hands and was pulled down from the railing, and right into Jack's arms.  
Fresh tears gathered in Mark's eyes, and he couldn't stop the sob coming forth from his throat. Jack held him tightly, mumbling quiet words of reassurance, letting Mark cry into his shoulder. It took quite a while for Mark to calm down, before he let go of Jack and took a step back from him, rubbing his eyes and nose once more.  
"Do ya have a car or somthin'?", Jack asked, keeping his voice soft. He hadn't seen another car or anything when he had arrived, but he better made sure.  
Mark shook his head softly. "Took a cab..", he mumbled, and Jack nodded in response. He couldn't imagine how Mark was feeling right now, how anyone could be driven so far to want and to try to kill themselves.  
"Let's get us home then, a'right?", Jack held a hand to Mark again, unsure why, but wanting to hold the stranger's hand. Maybe he was scared Mark would fall behind, get lost, or change his mind. Whatever it was, Mark seemed not to think too much about it, before grabbing Jack's hand and letting him lead the way.  
  


 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And i start another story, kill me goddamn  
> Updates will be slow probably, so don't worry if there is nothing for a while. You're allowed to remind me tho  
> But yeah, got inspired by ScytheMeister7's short drabble/story "I'm so tired". Y'all should read it!!  
> Also, if you have any suggestions for a better title, throw them at me!


	2. Chapter 2

The car ride to jack's apartment was quiet. Mark was looking out of the window, and had pulled down the sleeves of his flannel. It was a rather cold night tonight, though Jack could tell the flannel wasn't very thick. At least it was comfortably warm in the car.  
Jack risked some glances at Mark, a worried frown still on his face. Mark was leaning his head against the window, staring outside at the passing scenery. Jack really wondered what had happened to Mark, what made him the way he is. He didn't like seeing him like that, that he was sure of.

When Jack parked in front of his apartment building, he sighed, looking at Mark. His gaze, reflected in the side mirror outside, was so empty. Jack hoped he could bring happiness back to this guy, and have him continue living.  
"Let's go", he said, getting out of the car. He waited for Mark, before locking the car and leading his guest into the building, up the elevator to the fourth floor and to the apartment at the end of the hall. Jack lead Mark inside, telling him where the bathroom and his own room where, before letting Mark stay in the guest room. He thanked Jack, voice quiet, and Jack smiled in response, wishing him a good night. He did tell Mark he could wear the clothes in the drawer in the room, if he found some that fit him, before leaving him. He didn't want his guest to sleep in his street clothes, if he could help it.

Jack had troubles falling asleep, after he laid down in bed. He had a practically stranger in his home, sleeping just down the hall, who had tried to kill himself. Jack had no idea why he cared so much about this person, why he had tried so hard to get Mark to stop and go down. But he couldn't back out now anymore, he had promised Mark to talk with him and that he could go back to trying and killing himself if Jack didn't succeed in talking through Mark.  
He eventually fell asleep though, his sleep staying dreamless, but restful. He wasn't necessarily a morning person, but he had gotten used to waking up rather early, before noon at least. When he did wake up, he stretched in his bed and let the occurrences from the day before wash over him.

When he finally got everything through his head, Jack stood up and stretched again, before making his way out of his room and to the kitchen. Not hearing any noises, he assumed Mark was still asleep, or at least in the guest room. So, he started making coffee and getting out some things for a simple breakfast, setting everything on the small table in the kitchen. Rubbing his eyes, Jack made his way to the guest room, knocking gently on it.  
"Mark? You awake?", he asked, opening the door a little. He got a hum as response, which prompted him to open the door further and look inside.  
Mark had apparently found something else to sleep in, since his clothes were somewhat folded laying on the drawer. Mark himself was sitting up in bed now, and upon Jack's eyes landing on him, his breath got aught in his throat.  
Mark looked incredibly cute and kind of hot without his glasses and disheveled bed-head hair. He looked at Jack with half-lidded eyes, clearly tired still, before waving softly.  
Jack blushed a little, questioning himself how he could think something like that about someone he had just met, before clearing his throat and getting those thoughts out of his head.  
"I got coffee in tha kitchen. Come whenever yer ready", he told Mark, before leaving the room again.

Jack sat at the table in the kitchen, drinking from his cup of coffee with a spoon full of sugar, and made himself a sandwich. He let his thoughts wander, and they all soon resolved around Mark. He hoped he could help him, and maybe become friends with him. If Mark still wanted to kill himself... Jack wasn't sure if he could stop him again. Not without knowing him better.  
He was pulled out of his thoughts when Mark entered the kitchen, wearing some of Jack's old sweatpants and a long-sleeved shirt, which hugged his chest and arms, letting Jack see the muscles beneath. Jack tied not to stare at Mark, so instead he looked at the table, picking up his food to take a bite.  
Mark sat down across from him, a cup of coffee already standing there, but black. He seemed hesitant, but he did pick up the sugar at least and put in three spoonfuls and then a little milk. Stirring his coffee, he stayed silent, his gaze also on the table.

"Ya can eat somethin' if ya like", Jack said eventually, after the silence between them became too thick for him to handle. He had obviously startled Mark, he had probably been lost in thought. When he looked up to Jack, he smiled at him, to assure him it was fine. Mark still hesitated, before going to make himself a PJ sandwich.  
"How about I tell ya 'bout myself?", Jack said then, knowing that Mark would probably still be closed off and wouldn't open up to Jack quickly. Looking at Mark, the man nodded slightly.  
"Like I told ya, 'm twenty-six. I live 'ere alone, but my friends come by from time to time. I got a pretty chill job that I love with all I got, an' work from home. 'm my own boss", Jack told Mark, trying not to mention that he was a popular YouTuber. He didn't know how Mark would react to that, and if he'd know how much money Jack made with that. Even if Mark seemed like a decent guy, you could never be too careful.  
Mark nodded along, drinking from his coffee. He barely touched his food, but Jack decided not to mention it. Maybe Mark just wasn't very hungry, or just didn't feel like eating much. They were quiet for some time, before Mark spoke up.  
"Why did you dye your hair green?... If you don't mind me asking..", he seemed unsure if he could ask, but Jack smiled in response, hoping it'd calm Mark down, show him it's okay.

"Dyed it fer charity, decided ta keep it", Jack responded with a grin. He loved his green hair, and he had different shades of it as well over time. His favorite was the bright green though, though he really needed to re-dye his hair soon again.  
"Why did'ya dye yer hair, Mark?", he asked then, curious. The faded blue looked good on Mark, strands of his unkempt hair hanging in his face. He still didn't wear his glasses, Jack noticed, which made him look closer at Mark's eyes. A beautiful hazel brown.  
"First I had it bright pink... my friends dyed their hair for an event, and pulled me along", he answered quietly, looking into his cup of coffee. "I liked coloured hair, so... I just dyed it blue when the pink was faded". Jack smiled at Mark in response, imagining him with pink hair. It looked kind of silly, but also amazing.   
"What kind'a event was it fer?", Jack asked then, trying to get to know more about Mark, without prying what got him onto that bridge. He really wanted to know, but he didn't want Mark to shut him out.

"It was.. uhm.. well.. It was for a livestream", Mark answered, clearly unsure if he should've answered that or not. If he should've told Jack or not. But he had, and it made Jack more curious.  
"A livestream? On YouTube or?", Jack asked then, and Mark just nodded, not looking at Jack. Instead, he drank more from his coffee. Jack's face lit up, that was interesting! So Mark was friends with some YouTubers! He wondered who, maybe he could ask.  
"Mind tellin' who yer friends are?", he asked, not hiding his curiosity one bit. He really wanted to know, maybe he knew them! And maybe he could talk to them as well, about Mark...  
"I'd- I'd rather not..", was Mark's answered, and he shifted in his seat a little. Jack deflated a little, but quickly smiled again and nodded.  
"I understand, it's a'right", Jack assured Mark, hoping that he didn't feel bad about not telling him. Mark did seem to relax a little, hearing those words, so that was good.

"So Mark, what about yer family?", Jack asked then, his tone careful. He didn't want to pry, but he really wanted, and needed, to talk with Mark. He needed to know what happened to Mark and how he could help him, _if_ he could help him.  
Mark looked away from Jack, from the table, instead looking to the ground. He fidgeted around with his cup, which was empty by now. He looked uncomfortable, but also like he was debating on telling Jack or not.  
"I have an older brother... and my mom", he finally said, his voice quiet. He hugged himself, taking a shuddering breath. "M-my dad died... when I was seventeen..", he added, voice barely above a whisper.  
"'m sorry to hear tha' Mark", Jack kept his voice soft, quiet. He felt sorry that Mark had to go through that, he couldn't imagine having any of his family die when he was only seventeen.  
"It's- it's fine", Mark took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down. He was clearly not fine, but Jack decided that he couldn't do anything about that right now.  
"I still got both my parent's. An' I'm the youngest of five. Got two older brothers an' sisters", Jack told Mark then, feeling it was only fair to tell Mark about him too. "They're still livin' in Ireland, where 'm from, if ya weren't able ta guess from my accent", Jack chuckled lightly, and was delighted when he saw Mark smiling a little as well. A smile really suited him.

"What... what brought you over here? To LA?..", Mark asked then, and Jack was honestly glad that Mark asked questions. He paid attention to what they were talking about and he actually talked with Jack. Sure, it wasn't much, but Jack couldn't expect Mark to just tell him everything.  
"I uh... needed a fresh start. Change of scenery. Had ta leave behind ol' memories", Jack answered with a little shrug. Mark sensed that was a topic Jack didn't like talking about, so he only nodded.  
"I come from Cincinnati... came here due to several reasons", Mark told Jack then, and he nodded. Jack wouldn't pry to know why exactly Mark came here, he was glad that Mark talked to him at all, out of his own free will.  
"Do ya have a home?", Jack asked then. It'd be good to know, especially since Mark would -hopefully- return to his own home again. As soon as Jack knew he'd stay alive..  
"Y-yeah... I have a small apartment a few blocks from here... Got a motorcycle too", Mark answered, adding the last part quietly. Jack couldn't imagine what would've happened to that if Mark was gone. Maybe someone he knows, family or friends, would take it? Jack shook his head softly, getting those thoughts away. Mark would stay alive, he'd make sure of that.

"How about we go there an' get ya some stuff", Jack suggested, making Mark look up to him in confusion, head slightly tilted. It looked kind of cute.  
"I'd like ya ta stay with me for a while. Until yer okay again", Jack clarified, smiling softly at Mark. He still couldn't exactly say that he knew Mark, but he knew that he wanted him to live and become better.  
"Why?..", Mark asked, his voice clearly carrying the confusion and disbelief he felt. "Why do you care so much?...", he lowered his gaze again, his voice falling quiet.  
"Why shouldn't I? I like ya Mark, an' ya seem like a great guy. An' now that I know ya a lil', I really don' want ya tha die..", Jack explained, voice becoming quieter the more he talked. He really didn't want Mark to die, he realized. He really did care for him now, and it'd pain him to see him go.  
Mark stayed silent for a while, gaze on the table. He fidgeted with his mug again, turning it around and around. Jack just looked at him, quietly, letting Mark turn what he said over and over in his mind. In the end, he looked up to Jack, looking into his eyes for a moment. Jack smiled at him, reassuring him that everything was fine.  
"I...okay", Mark nodded, looking away again. "We can go..". Jack smiled happily at Mark, glad that he allowed him that. Maybe everything would work out, and Jack could really help him get better.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The first day of living together starts! Jack gets to know Mark a little!  
> I've almost written all of this story by this point, which is good, since I shouldn't have too many stories going on at once  
> So yeah, the development mind not be the best, or seem to quickly, and honestly I've written most while rather tired sooo  
> I apologize if in future chapters, Mark opens up too quickly or something, especially once you know about his past  
> Though since I changed the tags you'll be able to guess anyways but eh  
> Enough spoilerinos and stuff!


	3. Chapter 3

Mark's apartment wasn't that far away from Jack's, like he had said, only a few blocks away. It was small, but nice. Mark had been clearly uncomfortable entering his home, and Jack hadn't tried to push him, giving him time. When he did finally enter, he let Jack walk around, while he went to get the essentials to stay with Jack for a while.  
Jack wandered around, taking in the small apartment. There wasn't much to see, nothing that made the place seem like it belonged to anyone. While Mark was in the bathroom, gathering his things there, Jack peeked into the bedroom. He found Mark's bag laying on his bed, where he had already put in some clothes by the looks of it. Jack also saw a PC on a desk in the corner, a rather good one as well. It made him wonder if Mark liked videogames.

They didn't talk on the way back to Jack either. They had decided to leave Mark's motorcycle at his apartment for now, since Jack didn't want Mark driving it and he himself couldn't. But he promised that Mark could get it soon, so that it wouldn't stand there with no one to take care of it for too long.  
Once they were back at Jack's apartment, Jack told Mark that he'd be in his office for work, and that he shouldn't mind if he was shouting. Mark just nodded quietly, saying it'd be no problem and he'd just stay in his room and maybe get some sleep. Jack did tell him he could go into the living room and play some games if he wanted, before leaving to go and record.  
Jack would probably tell Mark soon about his career, depending if Mark heard much of his shouting or not. He had his room mostly soundproofed, but he could never be too sure. He tried not to be too loud anyways, but without forcing himself to be different. He didn't want to have his subscribers notice that his mind was mostly elsewhere, not on the game, since he didn't want to tell them about Mark.

Jack was finished with recording two hours later, and just wrapped up things now. It wasn't quite lunchtime, but he'd check up on Mark and see how he was doing. If his guest wanted lunch, then he'd have nothing against it. So he got up and left his room, walking over to the guest room. He knocked softly, and after receiving no answer, peeked inside.  
Jack found Mark laying on the bed, curled up in on himself, still wearing the clothes Jack had lend him. The blanket only covered his feet and his calves, but with his long-sleeved shirt, he'd probably not be cold. Seeing how he was asleep, Jack decided that he could go back and maybe record a little more, or chat with his friends, see what they're up to.

So Jack went back to his office, after closing Mark's door quietly, and sat back down. He saw that Felix was still online, so he decided to chat a little with him. Not long after, the two of them were playing some game together and recording, having decided they did that far too little. Jack didn't mention Mark to Felix, and actually succeeded in keeping the man out of his mind while playing.  
When they were done, it was already in the afternoon, a little late for lunch. But Jack was hungry, so he decided that once he had everything with his recording wrapped up, he'd made some lunch. He probably still had some pasta -convenience food- that'd be quickly done and be enough for himself and his guest. So after setting the water for the noodles up, he went to mark's room.

He knocked, and after receiving a "Come in" from Mark, Jack opened the door and took a step inside. Mark was still laying in bed, on his side, but had his phone in his hands. He had previously left it at his own apartment, before going out to the forest, but Jack had thought it'd be a good idea if he took it with him now. Thankfully Mark hadn't been too unsure about it and actually took it with him, which prompted Jack to swap numbers with the man.  
"I'm makin' some lunch. Hope pasta's good with ya", Jack informed him, observing Mark. He looked tired, everything about him screamed exhaustion. It worried Jack.  
".. thank you", Mark said after a while, quietly, looking at Jack with a small grateful smile. Jack smiled back at Mark, glad to see another smile on his face. It was far too rare in Jack's opinion.  
"I'll come get ya when it's done", Jack said, still smiling, before leaving the room. He left the door slightly ajar, which Mark didn't seem to mind, before going back to his cooking.

When he was done cooking and set dishes on the table, Jack went into the hall and called for Mark. No need to go get him personally, if they weren't that far apart, right? Right, because Mark called back, though not as loudly as Jack. He went back into the kitchen then, waiting for Mark. When he heard the guest room door close, he went ahead and took a plate to get some food for himself. Once Mark arrived, he motioned to the other plate, which Mark hesitantly took.  
"It's nothin' great, but we can get take-out fer dinner later", Jack said, making room at the stove for Mark to get something to eat as well. He stayed quiet and just nodded slightly, making Jack a little worried if Mark was alright. He seemed to be okay, apart from his usual sad gaze he always seemed to have. He didn't take much, making Jack wonder if Mark was just not very hungry today or if there was another reason, but he didn't ask. He was sure it'd make Mark uncomfortable.  
"Let's watch a movie, a'right?", Jack asked then, smiling at Mark, who silently nodded. Jack frowned at Mark's behaviour, but went towards the living room anyways, Mark in tow. They settled onto the couch, keeping enough space between them.  
"Which movie ya wanna watch?", Jack asked, looking at Mark with a questioning gaze and a small smile, hoping to get Mark more relaxed. Mark shrugged in response.  
"Whatever you'd like", he said quietly, making Jack sigh. He chose a film he liked, and they both leaned into the couch, beginning to eat while the movie started.

Jack couldn't help himself but glance at Mark every few minutes. Mark was pushing his food around on his plate mostly, but thankfully did eat as well. He kept his gaze either on the movie, on the plate or on the ground, the plate getting replaced with his lap once he was finished eating and put down his plate. Jack wondered what went through Mark's head. He didn't seem happy, and like something was always on his mind. He knew that Mark really wasn't happy, but he wished he would know what was wrong. He wanted to help Mark, but he didn't know what was wrong.  
He knew that Mark felt like a burden, and that he was tired. He wondered if Mark felt like a burden right now as well. He lived with Jack for now after all, got taken care of practically. Jack could imagine that Mark would feel like a burden to him.

When he was finished with eating, he turned to face Mark better. He knew that movie anyways, so he didn't care not seeing more of it. And Mark seemed occupied with his thoughts anyways, so he wouldn't be bothered either.  
"Mark", Jack said, causing Mark's head to snap towards Jack, startled. Jack tried to not look intimidating, or anything else bad, and after a moment Mark seemed a little less tense.  
"Yer not a burden, ya know that, right?", Jack told him, a slight frown on his face. Mark looked taken aback by what Jack said, his gaze falling onto his lap, where he fidgeted with the end of his sleeves.  
"I'm an inconvenience...", he muttered, not daring to look at Jack. "You shouldn't have to look after me..". He sounded like he genuinely believed that, and that he was sorry that Jack was doing this. It hurt Jack, knowing something must have happened to Mark to make him think like that.  
"Yer not. An' I look after ya 'cause I want to. Not 'cause I have ta do it", Jack said, his voice soft and gentle. He wanted Mark to get better, and he didn't mind having him here to help him.  
Mark stayed silent, his gaze fixed on his hands. Jack couldn't stand seeing Mark so sad, so he scooted closer and hugged him. Mark tensed under the sudden hug, but he relaxed slightly when Jack started to rub small circles onto his back. A moment passed, before Mark leaned against Jack and held onto him. He started to mutter quiet apologies, tears soon soaking into Jack's shirt. But he didn't mind, instead, he reassured Mark that he was fine, that he had nothing to apologize for, that Jack cared and wants to help Mark.

Minutes passed, before Mark had calmed down again. He excused himself, saying he would take a short shower and go to bed afterwards. Jack let him, telling him goodnight with a smile, turning off the TV. He put away the used dishes, soon hearing the water run in the bathroom. Since he himself wasn't tired, he went back to his office to scroll through social media, answer comments, reblog art on tumblr, make some tweets.  
After watching some videos, also having checked if his uploads were on schedule -which they were- Jack was tired. He turned off his PC and went in the bathroom, getting ready for bed, before heading into his room. His mind was once again plagued by thoughts, revolving around Mark. What had happened to him? What had made him like this? What had driven him to suicide? There were many more questions that went through Jack's head, before he finally fell asleep.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A yes, daily life. Mark being a poor babu  
> I honestly have no idea what to write in these notes, since it's been so long since I've actually written this xD  
> So yeah, hope you enjoy!  
> Oh and, I dunno if it's gonna be 10 or 9 chapters. I have 9 and could end it there, but I had planned for one more...  
> Hm, I'll see


	4. Chapter 4

The next few days came and went like the first. Jack noticed that Mark never ate much and basically always was in his room, either napping or on his phone. He always wore long sleeved shirts, jackets or hoodies, even when it was warm outside. And when it was more cold, he wouldn't wear any warmer clothes either. Jack noticed that when Mark was outside and came home, he often had scrapes like he had fallen down. Mark just said he was clumsy and tripped over his own feet from time to time. That didn't help Jack feel worried for him, especially since Mark always picked at his wounds and scratched them back open.  
Once, Mark had fallen asleep on the couch. Jack didn't mind at all, but when he went to put a blanket over Mark, he noticed that his sleeve of the flannel he was wearing had slid down. Normally he wouldn't have paid that any mind, but with Mark's behaviour, he couldn't stop himself from taking a closer look. And his suspicions were confirmed, when he saw clean red lines on his wrist, going further down his arm. Jack didn't dare pull down the sleeve further, but he did carefully take a peek on Mark's other arm, seeing the same thing.

It hurt. Jack's heart hurt for Mark, unable to imagine how someone could hurt themselves so badly. It made him really sad, and he was glad that Mark at least didn't hurt himself so bad that he needed to go to the hospital, that he didn't need any stitches. It still wasn't a pretty sight, and it still worried Jack a lot, but he knew that Mark was hurt. Emotionally, mentally. And that caused him to harm himself, not only with the cutting, but also with re-opening his wounds, with being clumsy and getting hurt, with freezing in cold weather and sweating in hot weather.  
Jack always tried to take care of Mark, to attend to his wounds and make him wear appropriate clothes for whatever weather they were having, but it wasn't easy. Mark didn't want any help, but he let Jack do whatever he wanted anyways. And Jack knew he didn't want help because he felt like a burden, but that just made him wonder why Mark let Jack help anyways.

One evening, the two of them were sitting in the living room together, playing a video game. Jack was glad he had been able to convince Mark, since he had honestly doubted the guy would play with him. Some time during the game, Jack started to get angry with it. He died over and over and it just wasn't fair! He got really worked up over it, shouting and throwing his controller against a pillow on the couch. With his arms crossed and an angry glare on his face, Jack noticed that Mark's character wasn't doing anything. Furrowing his brows, Jack looked over at Mark.  
Mark's controller laid next to him, while he himself was tightly curled in a ball, in the corner of the couch. He was hiding his face behind his arms, his whole being was shaking. Jack could even hear quiet whimpers coming from him. He immediately calmed his anger, now concern for his friend took over. He had scared him.  
"Mark?..", he quietly asked, concern written all over his face. He scooted a little closer to Mark, who didn't respond. His breathing was short and quick, and there were some quiet sobs. Did he have a panic attack?...

"Mark, I'm sorry. I'm not mad at ya, jus' tha game", Jack had no idea what to do, he only knew that Mark needed to calm down. He'd keep in mind not to get too angry around Mark, to not scare him again in the future, but for now he needed to try and help, somehow.  
"It's not yer fault, yer a'right. Everything's okay. Yer okay. Yer fine", Jack kept his voice as calm as he could, and soft. He sat next to Mark, not touching him in fear it'd scare him further.  
"C'mon, breathe with me, a'right?", Jack prompted quietly. "In... an' out... In.... an' out....", he repeated that over and over, breathing deeply. It took a while, before Mark tried to mimic him, his shaking slowly ceasing. It took a long time, until Mark's shaking stopped and his breathing evened out. He sniffed, and Jack gave him a tissue, which he hesitantly accepted.  
"I'm sorry Mark", Jack apologized. "I shouldn't have yelled like tha'. Stupid game". He didn't want to frighten Mark, but he hadn't known. They hadn't talked about what had happened to Mark in the past, the man still not ready enough to tell Jack.  
"I-It's- it's o-okay", Mark stuttered, still curled up in on himself, but not hiding away. He didn't look at jack though. "I- I shouldn't h-have- have reacted like- like that".  
Jack frowned at that, shaking his head softly. "Mark, look at me, please", he said, and after a moment, Mark did. His brown eyes still filled with tears, glasses askew on his face.  
"It's not yer fault. Nothin' ya should apologize fer", Jack said, his voice firm, but gentle. He needed Mark to understand that it wasn't his fault. When Mark was about to say something again, Jack stopped him.  
"No, no arguing. I got worked up over nothin', it's tha game's fault. You have done nothin' wrong". Mark looked away from Jack again, but after a moment, he nodded. Jack let out a sigh of relief, he was glad Mark didn't argue further. He still worried about him though.

"Do ya wanna talk about it?..", Jack asked, once he got Mark a cup of hot chocolate and turned the game off, instead letting the TV run as background noise. Mark drank a little, thinking about it probably, and Jack let him. He didn't ask again, he didn't push. If Mark wanted to talk, he'd talk.  
"I... had a boyfriend, not that long ago... a few months", Mark started, his voice quiet. He sounded almost broken, and it hurt Jack to hear him like that. "He... he wasn't the best person...", he admitted. He stayed quiet for a while, drinking again.  
"Do ya want to tell me... what he did?..", Jack asked, uncertain if he could ask that. "Maybe it'll help, get it of yer chest?...", he honestly didn't know, but he hoped it would help. Mark stayed silent for a while, thinking about it.  
"He... he used me. He had a girlfriend on the side, cheating on me... I don't know for how long, but.. but it was long. He didn't care for me... what I did, how I felt. When- when I- when I didn't do what.. what he wanted, he'd- he'd h-hurt me", Mark began to stutter, clutching the mug in his hands. Tears gathered in his eyes, and he needed to take deep breaths to calm himself down.  
"I- I had to- to lie to my friends... when they noticed that I wasn't okay, that- that I was hurt. I l-lied to them... The worst was when- when I- when I moved in with him...", Mark trailed off, a few tears escaping him. He ignored them, drinking his hot chocolate. "I- I had to though", he said, when he saw the look on Jack's face -he couldn't imagine why Mark would move in with his abusive boyfriend.  
"I- I lived with my friends at the timeb-because- because I... was having a hard time.. B-but I was such a burden to them! S-so.. when my e-ex boyfriend suggested I'd move in with him... I agreed", Mark told Jack, his voice small and unsure. He didn't want to know Jack's reaction to all this.

"It was terrible... I- I barely left the house, since- since I was so hurt... I was b-barely able to- to hide all the bruises...", he trailed off again, staring into his cup. Jack used the pause to gather his thoughts. Mark had had an abusive boyfriend in the past, who not only used him and abused him, but also cheated on him almost the whole time they were together. And he used Mark's situation, when he had had a hard time in his life, living with his friends and feeling like a burden, to make Mark's life even more horrible.  
"Mark?..", Jack said softly, and after receiving a slight nod from Mark, continued. "What happened after that?...", he asked. Somehow Mark had ended with his own apartment again after all, but Jack was a little scared what might all have happened to Mark.  
"He... eventually got bored of me... Told me I- I was a- a useless, w-worthless waste of- of space... to get lost... and- and his g-girlfriend was t-there too...", Mark sniffed, setting down his cup to rub at his eyes. "I was on the street for a few days... until one of my friends found out and... took me in...", he trailed off again, tears rolling down his cheeks. He furiously wiped at them, trying to get them away, to stop crying.

Jack would have none of that though, and pulled Mark into a hug. The man tensed up for a moment, before relaxing and clinging to Jack, letting his sobs free. Jack held him quietly, rubbing soothing circles onto his back. He muttered quiet words to Mark, telling him that he was safe here and that everything was okay now. That he wasn't useless, wasn't worthless, and not a waste of space. That Jack cared for him and liked him. He repeated that over and over again, until Mark calmed down again.  
His breathing had evened out, his crying had ceased and he wasn't shaking anymore. Jack easily noticed that Mark had fallen asleep, and he didn't care at all. Instead, he carefully turned off the TV, before laying down, with Mark still clinging to him. Jack didn't mind though, instead he held Mark close to himself, before drifting off to sleep himself.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More tragic backstory! Now including the newest tags! Woohoo!  
> Uh yeah. Mark is a poor babu and I love his suffering


	5. Chapter 5

After that incident, Jack made sure to remind Mark that he wasn't a burden to him, but his friend and roommate. That he was welcome here and could eat as much as he wanted, play games and watch movies whenever he wanted. Jack made sure to tell Mark that he cared for him and would miss him when he was gone.  
Ever so slowly, Mark began to warm up a little. He began to eat more and wasn't staying in his room all the time. He was still hesitant doing whatever he wanted, but it was much better than in the beginning. Jack deemed it okay for Mark to get his motorcycle here too, and Mark had been honest to Jack and admitted he felt better with it now here, and not at his apartment.

With Mark opening up slowly to Jack, he was smiling more often and talking more as well. It made Jack happy, he was glad to see Mark getting better. There still were fresh wounds on Mark's arms that Jack just never was able to stop Mark from getting, and there were still panic attacks Jack couldn't predict, but it was getting better. Slowly, but surely.

One night, Jack had been deep asleep. He didn't notice his bedroom door open and someone enter the room. Only when he was gently shook awake, did he groggily open his eyes. In the darkness, he could barely make out Mark, but as soon as he saw the tears in the man's eyes, he sat up.  
"What's wrong?...", Jack asked, mumbling, and patting the bed, to indicate Mark to sit down. He hesitated, before doing so. He stayed silent though, and when Jack was about to ask again, Mark was suddenly hugging him, clinging tightly to Jack.  
"Mark?..", Jack asked softly, hugging the man back and holding him, rubbing circles onto his back. One hand found its way into Mark's hair, petting it softly, which seemed to calm Mark slightly down.  
"I- I...", Mark started, sobs stopping him from talking further. Jack hushed him softly, telling him to take his time. So Mark did, letting himself cry until he calmed down enough to speak again.  
"I- I thought- was thinking a-about... that I-... want to die..", Mark got quieter through his sentence, his clinging to Jack getting weaker. Jack, in return, held Mark tighter against him, nuzzling his face into the faded blue hair.  
"Thank ya fer comin' ta me", he mumbled, holding Mark tight against his chest. "An' not doin' anythin' stupid. I'm proud of ya Mark".  
Mark was surprised, even shocked, by those words, fresh sobs escaping his throat. He pressed his face into the crook of Jack's neck, clinging to Jack. No one had been so nice to him before, no one had ever reacted to his thoughts like that.

The next morning, Jack woke up with an unfamiliar warmth next to him, and partly on top of him. Looking down at his side, he saw Mark there, his head laying on Jack's shoulder, snuggled up into his side, and having one arm over Jack's stomach. Jack, in return, had had his face in Mark's hair and an arm over Mark's waist, holding him close to himself. He remembered what happened that night, and he smiled softly, a little sad too though. Mark had thought about dying, had _wanted_ to die. But he was so, _so_ , glad that Mark had woken Jack up and told him, instead of hurting himself badly, or disappearing from the apartment, or suffered through those thoughts alone. It meant he trusted Jack. He believed him when Jack said he cared.  
Jack nuzzled his face back into Mark's hair, enjoying the warmth and closeness of him. He had grown close to Mark, he cared immensely for him and couldn't imagine him gone again. He had no idea how, but over the course of a few weeks, Jack had began crushing on Mark. Maybe he even loved him. He most certainly liked him a lot, and didn't want him to leave.

When Mark woke up, he grumbled to himself, cuddling further into Jack's side, which caused the man to giggle softly. The sound surprised Mark, and he almost immediately looked up. Seeing he was cuddled up to Jack, his eyes widened slightly, and he was about to scramble away, if Jack wouldn't have pulled him closer to himself again.  
"It's a'right Marky. I like ya 'ere. Don' worry about it", Jack said softly, smiling at Mark. That seemed to calm him down, and he nodded slightly, going back to cuddling with Jack. They both stayed quiet then, just enjoying the presence of each other.

Eventually they both had to get up though, and they made some breakfast together. Mark seemed a lot happier today, smiling more at Jack. That made Jack happier as well, he smiled brightly and was in general really happy. When he was recording later then, it was notable how he was happier than he had been the last weeks.  
While Jack recorded, Mark was in the living room. He had started to spend more time there, than in his room. Here he could hear Jack a little easier when Jack was especially loud, and he didn't feel so caged. He felt more free in the living room, like he was supposed to be there. Like he was welcome. And he was, he knew that, even when he had a hard time remembering that sometimes.  
He was on his phone, scrolling through the messages he had gotten and never answered. He had ignored his friends for a while before his attempt, and when they noticed he wasn't anywhere to be found, they had freaked out. A day after Jack and him had gotten his things, he had read through the messages and looked through the missed calls. So many people had worried about him, but he hadn't felt anything at the time. He had written them all "I'm fine" and ignored anything else that was written to him, ignored any calls.

Now though, Mark took a deep breath and messaged his friends again. Well, one of them at least, he'd tell all the others anyways. Of course, Mark's friend Arin was pissed that Mark had ignored everyone for so long, but he also had been incredibly relieved to hear that Mark was alive and okay. That Arin practically immediately called Mark once he was messaged, hadn't been a surprise to the man. It was good that Arin knew about Mark's panic attacks, so he didn't yell at Mark, though he was clearly pissed at first.  
Arin made Mark tell what had happened, so Mark did. He told him he had planned to kill himself in the forest, but someone had stopped him. That person, named Jack, had made it his mission to take care of Mark and made sure he wouldn't try to kill himself again. So he stayed with Jack, and now he felt much better than before. He still wasn't healed of course, he still had his depressed days and he was still hiding wounds under his sleeves, but he was better.  
After Mark was done telling his tale, Arin made Mark promise to visit him as soon as possible. And since Mark knew he didn't have a choice in the matter anyways, he promised with a soft smile on his face. It'd be good to see his friends again, he knew that.

When Jack was done recording, he found Mark laying on the couch with a small smile still on his lips, scrolling through his phone and texting. The sight made Jack smile, he was always really happy when he saw Mark with a smile on his face.  
"Who yer texting?", Jack asked, curious, and leaned over the couch slightly. He didn't try to attempt to look at Mark's phone though, knowing that Mark really didn't like that. It made him uncomfortable, reminding him of his ex boyfriend, who apparently had also been a little bit very controlling. Making sure Mark didn't tell anyone about what was happening...  
"My friends", Mark replied and looked up to Jack, directing his smile at him. The sight made Jack's heart flutter and feel all warm. A smile really looked beautiful on Mark.  
"They want us to come visit them, is that okay?..", Mark asked, sounding a little unsure again. He still never knew if Jack really was okay with Mark, with what he was doing. But Jack always made sure to reassure Mark.  
"Sure! I'd love ta meet them, an' they surely want ta meet ya again", Jack smiled at Mark, nodding. By now he had told Mark that he was a rather popular YouTuber, and that he played video games for a living. Mark hadn't been too surprised by that, admitting that his friends were YouTubers as well.

"When do ya want ta go?", Jack asked then, twirling a lock of Mark's blue hair between his fingers. He loved Mark's hair, it was really soft, and playing with it soothed him, and Mark as well.  
"As soon as you want to", Mark answered, closing his eyes while he enjoyed Jack's touch. He really liked Jack, and he was glad he was here, but... Mark knew he wasn't good enough for Jack. He would never be. He was broken and would never be healed, and he knew no one would be able to love him. But that was okay with him.  
"Then let's go now", Jack said and stood back up straight, stretching a little. Mark nodded in reply, locking his phone and putting it in his pocket before standing up. Together they made their way out then, and once sitting in the car, Mark gave Jack the address of where they would meet up.  
Once they arrived at the building, Mark looked a little anxious. He rubbed his lower arms, where Jack knew he was hiding his wounds. Jack smiled at him reassuringly, and once Mark was ready -signaling it with a nod- they got out.

They entered the building, which apparently was an office building of sorts, and Mark lead the way. He seemed anxious, so in a try to help him calm down, Jack grabbed his hands. Mark looked surprised, but seeing Jack smiling at him, he smiled back softly. He was grateful for the help he got from Jack, he wasn't sure he could do this without him.  
They walked through some hallways, passing doors and more hallways. Jack was always looking around curiously, wondering how many different people were here. He knew that the friends they were visiting were YouTubers, so they probably had a soundproofed office space. Jack didn't know many groups that had an office, though for many he just simply didn't know.  
Finally they stopped in front of a door, muffled chatter coming through. Mark looked unsure, looking at Jack for help. Jack smiled at Mark, squeezing his hand softly.  
"It'll be fine Mark. Ya can do it. 'm here for ya", Jack told him softly, and Mark nodded. He still needed a minute or two, until he raised his hand and knocked on the door.

The room behind the door fell silent for a second, before it quickly erupted into loud talking. Mark took a step back, which gained him a confused glance from Jack, but then the door already opened and a sturdy, and taller than both of them, man emerged.  
"Mark!", he enveloped Mark into a bone-crushing hug. He had brown hair that almost reached his shoulder, with a blond streak on the right side. A mustache and stubble adorned his face, and he in general, looked rather soft and cuddly.  
"We were extremely worried for you man!", he said, once he let go of Mark. He, in turn, looked to the side, holding his arm. Jack could tell how Mark felt just from looking at him.  
"I'm sorry Arin..", he muttered, voice low. He obviously felt bad about it, maybe even guilty. Arin seemed to sense that as well.  
"Hey man, it's okay. You're here now after all, right?", Arin said, patting Mark's shoulder. He just nodded in reply, making Arin frown lightly and sigh. He finally turned to Jack, smiling at the man.  
"Hey there! I'm Arin. You must be Jack!", he said, grinning brightly at Jack. He smiled back, nodding, watching Mark enter the office, listening to all the exclamations the people inside made upon seeing their friend.  
"Yeah, that's me", Jack said and nodded. Before he could react, Arin had pulled him into a hug as well, making Jack gasp in surprise.  
"Thanks for stopping him", Arin said, before letting go of Jack again. He had a grateful smile on his lips and was genuinely glad.  
"It's no problem. Any decent human being would'a done that", Jack shrugged, smiling bashfully. He was glad to know Mark had friends who cared so much about him, and he hoped that Mark realized that as well. That he'd be missed by many people.  
"Come on, let's acquaintance you with everyone", Arin said and put a hand around Jack's shoulder, guiding him inside the room and closing the door behind them. Jack was honest, he was a little nervous, especially since there were quite a few people inside.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEY LOOK IT'S THE FUCKING GRUMPS AGAIN  
> They always appear in my fics somehow, even though I barely know anything about them and don't even watch them xD  
> But yeah, we meet the Grumps a little!  
> Oh yeah, also Mark being a good bean and going to Jack when feeling depressed


	6. Chapter 6

The room they entered had two couches in front of a large TV, shelves next to it on both sides. Quite a few gaming consoles were in front of it, games in the shelves. There were three doors in the room, one of which was open. Jack could see a little through it, and it seemed to be something like a kitchen area. Judging from his knowledge, the other two doors probably lead to recording rooms. The TV looked like there would also be recordings going on, since Jack could spot some equipment necessary for it.  
There were currently five people in the room that Jack didn't know, and then there was of course Mark, Arin and himself. Mark was currently sitting on one of the couches, surrounded by the other people.

Right next to Mark was a guy, slightly taller than Arin. His hair also a dark shade of brown, long-ish and fuzzy -almost like an afro, but not? Hard to explain. He definitely is more build like Jack, though he was of course taller than Jack was, but not any less scrawny.  
On the other side of Mark sat the only woman of the group. Her hair long and almost as dark as Mark's, she also had a blond streak in her hair, on the right side. She definitely was beautiful, and looked to be a little smaller than Arin.  
On the other couch sat three guys, the one that looked the youngest was thin and had short light brown hair, next to him a guy build more sturdy, messy dark hair and a full, but short, beard. And the last looked the oldest, hair already graying and wrinkles clear on his face.

Everyone seemed to talk to Mark, or at least most of them did. Some stayed more quiet than the rest, but everyone seemed to pay attention. Mark looked a little uncomfortable, and Jack guessed that was because of the topic they were probably talking about. Jack hoped that Mark would be okay, but considering that they were all his friends, it should be fine.  
"So what's yer channel", Jack asked Arin then, facing him again. He knew they were YouTubers after all, and he was curious as to who exactly they were.  
"We're the GameGrumps!", Arin exclaimed proudly, grinning at Jack. He chuckled at his enthusiasm, nodding. He had actually heard of them, but hadn't seen much of them.  
"Do you have a channel as well? I feel like I know you", Arin asked then, looking Jack up and down again, with a focused look.  
"Yeah! I'm Jacksepticeye!", Jack said and grinned proudly as well, puffing out his chest playfully. It caused Arin to laugh softly, shaking his head.  
"The loud irish guy! I heard of you", Arin grinned and lightly punched Jack's shoulder, making him laugh a little as well.

Jack got introduced to everyone on the couches then, after talking a bit more with Arin. The two next to Mark were Danny and Suzy apparently, and the guys on the second couch were Ross, Barry and Brian. Some of them excused themselves shortly after, they had all gathered to see Mark again, but they still had things to do. So the second couch was empty soon again, so Jack and Arin sat down there together. They all talked to each other, Jack telling the Grumps and Mark about his channel, and the Grumps telling him in return about theirs. Mark apparently had had his own channel in the past, before everything went downhill for him, which had been the point he stopped doing videos. He only had helped the Grumps a little, sometimes, when he had a good day, playing with them.  
Jack was intrigued about the stories, curious about Mark's old channel. He hadn't deleted it thankfully, and Jack thought about if Mark could maybe continue it one day. He did feel better now thankfully, and maybe he would have fun doing it again. He apparently had loved it in the past after all.

They continued talking for a good while, before Suzy left the guys to their own as well. Not soon after she left, the four of them decided to play some games together. They had a few party games which they started to play, Jack talking with Danny and Arin about maybe recording something together. The Grumps had nothing against it, it'd make a great guest episode or two. And they could record something for Jack's channel as well, which they all agreed to.  
Mark stayed mostly silent during their conversation, only really saying something if it was about the game. Jack was a little concerned about that, so he tried to get Mark involved in the conversation, leading it away from the topic of recording. Seemed like Mark didn't like the thought of recording at the moment, which Jack could understand though. He wasn't in a good mindset to do that.

Jack and Mark stayed in the Grump office the whole evening. Some time pizza was ordered, and the ones that didn't have editing to do gathered on the couches and they played one vs one games, the players always changing depending on who was up to take a break while eating.  
Jack was glad to see Mark being comfortable here, not eating nothing and playing with the others, even joking around a little. It made him happy seeing Mark so glad again, even though sometimes he seemed to fall deep into thoughts, going quiet and distracted. Jack made sure to pull him out of his head at those times, since he could guess that there were only bad thoughts.  
When Jack began to feel tired, he and Mark decided to leave. They talked with Arin and Danny a little before leaving, about Mark and if it was alright if he still stayed with Jack, that he could come to them if he couldn't stay on his own. Jack waved them off, saying it was okay, and after exchanging numbers, Jack and Mark left.

The ride home was quiet, but comfortable. Mark was obviously thinking, fidgeting with his sleeves and emotions appearing and changing on his face. When Jack parked, he decided to just look at Mark for a while. The lights from outside were reflected in the man's glasses, blue strands of hair hanging in his face. He looked focused on whatever he was thinking about, but also unsure.  
"We're here", Jack finally said, after a few minutes of silence. Mark was startled, flinching and looking up quickly, looking around to see they were parked.  
"Oh, sorry", he smiled a little at Jack, apologetic, before they both left the car. Jack couldn't help himself but keep an eye on Mark, see how he fell back into his thoughts. He wondered what he was thinking about, but didn't ask. Mark still tended to do whatever he was asked, even if he didn't really want to.

"We should re-dye our hair", Jack declared once they entered his apartment again. He clearly took mark by surprise again, since he looked at Jack with a surprised gaze. It made him chuckle and grin at Mark.  
"I mean, my hair needs a re-dye badly, an' yers as well. Why not get it done together?", Jack shrugged, but kept grinning. Mark seemed unsure about it, but nodded with a small smile in the end.  
"I'll make an appointment at a hairdresser then. G'night Mark", Jack smiled at Mark, who smiled back and nodded again. With a small "Good night Jack", he left for his room. Jack knew it was too late to call anywhere now, so he made a reminder on his phone to do that tomorrow morning. He couldn't help but wonder if Mark would stay with blue or go with another colour, since apparently he had pink before blue. So maybe he'd go with another colour this time? Jack couldn't stop imagining Mark with different coloured hair, giggling when he imagined Mark with rainbow coloured hair.  
Jack had a much easier time to fall asleep that night. He had no worries about Mark for once, instead thinking about the time they had spend with the Grumps and how much fun they had had today.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a short chapter, huh  
> Did you know I still have no idea if I'm ever gonna write chapter 10 or not?  
> Maybe I'll let it end after 9, I'll let you decide when it's time~


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Description of self-harm in this chapter!

A few days later and the two men were sitting together in a hairsaloon, bleach in their hair and wrapped up in foil. They were both chatting with the Grumps, they had a group chat, and also talking to each other while doing so. The Grumps were ecstatic knowing that they got their hair dyed again, and Mark revealed that it won't be blue again, but he didn't reveal what colour. The guessing of everyone was amusing, especially since Jack had to guess as well. He'd only know once it was time for the colour.  
They were both having fun, both wearing bright smiles on their faces. It was the most happy Jack had seen Mark since knowing him, and he was incredibly happy to see Mark with such a bright smile. He couldn't deny he had a big crush on Mark, he was the most gorgeous man he knew, and he was very kind. Even with all of his problems and flaws, Jack loved him.

His eyes widening in realization, Jack stared intently at his phone. _He loved Mark_. It wasn't just a simple crush, it wasn't just an aesthetically attraction. He had fallen in love with him. Jack blushed when he realized it, glancing at Mark. He was chuckling at the group chat, where different colours were still guessed and argued over. Jack glued his eyes to his phone, though he couldn't concentrate on the words. His mind reeled over the fact that he had fallen in love with Mark.  
"Hey Jack", Mark called, causing Jack to quickly look up. He knew he most definitely was red in the face, though Mark didn't seem to notice.  
"Are you alright?", Mark asked, his brows furrowed a little. He looked worried, causing Jack to smile softly.  
"'m a'right. Our hair should be done soon", Jack said, hoping his cheeks would cool down again soon. Mark continued to look at Jack for a while, like he was searching for a while, before nodding.  
"Curious about the colour I chose?", Mark said with a grin, causing Jack to laugh and nod.  
"Yeah! But I bet ya look good in any colour though", Jack replied with a grin, and he saw how Mark blushed a little, looking at his phone again. Jack chuckled in response, shaking his head softly.

Around ten minutes later and they both were getting the colour in their hair. Jack had his favorite bright green, and he spotted Mark getting a firey bright red. Jack was sure Mark would look amazing with it, and he promised him not to tell the Grumps -who were all trying to get Jack to tell them as soon as they were back on their phone.  
About half an hour later and they were done. The colour looked amazing, and after they had dried their hair with the hairdryers, Jack couldn't help but marvel at the red floof that was Mark's hair. It looked amazing, and Jack complimented it immediately. It caused a soft blush on Mark's face again, though he replied that he didn't look as good as Jack, which caused him to blush in return.  
Jack had wanted to pay for Mark, but he absolutely didn't want that, so they both paid for themselves. Jack knew that Mark wasn't poor and still had money, but he still worried a little. He let him though and didn't argue further over it.

"Hey Mark", Jack spoke up during their ride home, knowing his friend was looking out of the window. He had something on his mind, an idea, he wanted to talk with Mark about.  
"Hm?", Mark answered, looking at Jack with a questioning gaze. It still made Jack happy to see Mark behave more open.  
"How about ya start yer channel again?", Jack suggested, and before Mark could say anything, he continued. "It'd be a good distraction fer ya an' ye would have somethin' to do", he explained. And depending on the community Mark had had before was, maybe he'd get some support he really needed.  
"I- I don't know...", Mark replied, looking to his lap, fidgeting with his sleeves. "I'd have to go back to my apartment for that...". His voice was quiet and the thought of going back to his apartment, being alone there, made him sad. He didn't want to leave Jack, if he was being honest. But he understood that he couldn't live with Jack forever, even if Jack told him the opposite, he was sure he was a burden on Jack.   
"It's just an idea Mark, don' worry about it", Jack said and gave Mark a reassuring smile, hoping to lift his mood a little again. "Ya can think over it, an' yer always welcome in my home".  
Mark hummed a little and nodded. He stayed in his thoughts, going straight to his room once they arrived home. He knew Jack would be worried about him, but he couldn't bring himself to care about it right now.

Once Mark was in his room, he curled up on his bed. He really should go back to his apartment. He hadn't felt like killing himself since that night where he'd gone to Jack, and even then he had been strong enough to not even hurt himself. He'd manage to live on his own again, he had for a long time after all. And here he was just an inconvenience, a burden. Jack constantly worried about him and had to make sure that he ate enough and dressed right.  
Curling up tighter, Mark started to shake, tears gathering in his eyes. He was sure if he'd get better, Jack would kick him out, tell him to go back to his own apartment. Jack was doing this all only out of pity, right? He had felt bad for a stranger about to kill himself and only took care of him for peace of mind. Not because he really cared.

The tears rolled over Mark's cheeks, sobs threatening to leave his throat. He bit into his pillow, to muffle the sounds he made, drowning in his thoughts.  
Jack wanted him gone, surely. Why else would he bring up to start YouTube again? Mark would have to go back to his apartment for that, Jack surely knew that. Of course he wanted Mark gone, he was a waste of space. A burden. He wouldn't care if he vanished and didn't appear again. He'd forget about him quickly.  
Sobs rocking his body, Mark buried his face into his pillow, letting it muffle his sobs, soaking in his tears. He knew he shouldn't think like that, Jack cared for him, his friends did, his family would be sad if he were gone... but he couldn't help himself, he couldn't stop those thoughts.  
It was a fight in his head, the knowledge that Jack, and many other people, cared, fought against the thoughts that it was all a lie, that no one cared.

Ruffing himself up, Mark sniffed and rubbed his eyes and nose on his sleeve. He got himself some tissues, blowing his nose, before getting up. He went to his bag, resting next to the drawer, where he leaned against the door and slid down. He didn't need to search long, before he pulled out a little bag. It had the bathroom things in it, like a small brush, toothbrush, -paste... his razor and blades...  
Mark pulled out one of the razorblades, taking it out of the paper wrapping. He pushed up his sleeve, not thinking when he pushed the razor against his skin, over and over and over again. Sometimes barely cutting it, mostly pushing the blade hard against his skin to cut deeper.  
He needed to do that, he needed to punish himself for those thoughts. He shouldn't think like that, he shouldn't doubt his friends. More and more reasons came to mind, and soon his whole arm was covered in red bleeding lines.  
Fresh tears ran over Mark's cheeks, and he leaned his head against the wall. He sobbed quietly, letting his hands rest on his lap. He knew he should stop this. If he didn't, one day the cuts would be too deep, get dangerous. But he couldn't bring himself to care about it.

Eventually he calmed down again, and he grabbed a tissue. Using spit, he wet it, before rubbing the blood off his arm carefully. The whole tissue was red by the end of it, and it took a minute or two until it stopped bleeding badly. Mark continued to just sit there though, feeling a familiar numbness envelope him. He let his mind be void of any thoughts, staring into nothingness.  
Slowly, thoughts began to invade his mind again. Thoughts about dying. He could kill himself so easily, in so many ways. He could go back to the forest, jump of that bridge into the rapid water of the river. He could cut himself open and bleed to death. He could go out into the cold night and maybe freeze to death. He could crash his motorcycle, somewhere and somehow, so that he wouldn't hurt anyone else with it.  
Mark let the thoughts envelope him, while he just sat there. He had let his eyes fall closed, not noticing any time passing at all. For all he knew, he could've sat there for just a few minutes, even though he actually was sitting there for an hour already.

Jack called for Mark, he had made something for lunch. When he got no response, Jack went to Mark's room. Maybe his friend was napping again? He did tend to do that a lot after all, especially when he had nothing else to do. And Mark did seem to be tired a lot still, though he didn't have the dark circles under his eyes anymore.  
Jack knocked gently on Mark's door, and when it stayed silent, he opened it carefully. Peering inside, Jack saw that the bed was empty. Frowning, he looked around, seeing Mark's legs on the ground. So he was sitting on the ground, mostly hidden by the drawer.  
"Mark?", Jack called, worried, and entered the room. He still didn't get a response, which prompted Jack to go inside with a little panic. He rushed towards Mark, and instantly saw the wounds on the man's arms. The cuts were red from fresh blood, which didn't gather into droplets anymore though. Still, Jack was scared.

"Mark, hey", he gently shook Mark's shoulder, and after a while his eyes lazily opened. Jack couldn't help the sigh of relief coming from him.  
"Thank god yer alright", Jack smiled, a little shakily. He was incredibly glad that Mark was okay, only a little dazed apparently.  
"I'll take care of yer arm. A'right?", he waited for a second, when he received no answer, he just assumed it was okay. He saw the little bag Mark had, so he looked inside to see if he found something that he could use. Apparently Mark was prepared for this, since he had gauze, medical tape and some kind of cream inside. Jack took everything, a tissue as well, before gently grabbing Mark's arm.  
He stayed quiet while carefully putting the cream on Mark's cuts, laying the tissue over them before wrapping the gauze securely around. Using two stripes of the medical tape, Jack finished the wrapping.

"It's okay Mark", he gently said, sitting down next to Mark. He had taken the razorblade out of Mark's hand and put it away, now leaning softly onto Mark.  
"'m not mad at ya. I know it's hard. An' stoppin' with hurtin' is hard. But I'm here for ya. Always", Jack took Mark's hand in his own, knowing that his arm would probably hurt a lot soon. But he wanted Mark to know that, to remember that.  
They sat in silence then, Mark leaning his head onto Jack's, which was on his shoulder. Jack still held Mark's hand, gently rubbing it with his thumb. He wished he could help Mark, he wished he could tell Mark that he loved him and that he meant it. But he was scared to tell him. He was scared about how Mark would react. So he didn't, kept it to himself.

Mark's stomach suddenly growled, causing Jack to chuckle. Mark couldn't stop himself from chuckling softly as well, and soon the two of them were laughing. The heavy, but kind of comfortable, atmosphere was gone.  
"Let's go eat, yeah?", Jack suggested, smiling at Mark. He looked at Jack, nodding slightly, with a small smile. They both got up then, and with still intertwined hands, they walked to the kitchen together.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So yeah, Mark is suffering some more, again.  
> But hey, their hair is dyed, that's good, right?  
> I wish I had someone like Jack tbh :c


	8. Chapter 8

Jack was alone in his apartment. It was strange to be alone, after weeks of sharing it with another person. Everything seemed more empty, more quiet, even though Mark hadn't been a loud person. But Jack very obviously felt the emptiness Mark left behind.  
He had gone back to his own apartment. Jack could understand that, even though he didn't want Mark to. But Jack couldn't baby him all the time, he couldn't always keep a close watch on Mark. The man had promised Jack to be careful while driving, and Mark had the spare key to Jack's apartment for emergencies. And he had promised to give Jack a key to his apartment as well.  
But sitting in his kitchen, eating alone, Jack felt incredibly lonely. He sighed, laying his head in his hand, propping his elbow onto the table. Maybe he should do and record something. He could also ask the Grumps about a date to when they should meet up and record something, which he decided to do now. Pulling out his phone, he texted Arin. A few minutes later and they had a date set, in a few days, were they could record everything together.

Once Jack had cleaned up the kitchen, he made his way into his recording room and set up his equipment, before searching for a game to play. He had a few he could play, though he didn't really feel like any of them at the moment. Pulling out his phone again, he texted Arin again, asking what Mark's YouTube channel had been. He was curious and he wanted to check it out. It didn't take long until he had the name, "Markiplier", and Jack looked it up, clicking on the first random video he found.  
 _"Hello everybody, my name is Markiplier!"_ , the intro rang out, the titlescreen of the game prominent with Mark's facecam in the upper left corner. Jack's eyes were instantly on him, seeing his bright smile, the happy twinkle in his eyes. He was much more full of life, more energetic. It made Jack sad, thinking about how Mark was now.  
Jack watched a few videos, before looking at the newest one, which was over a year old now. It was a vlog, where Mark explained that he'd take a break from YouTube. His eyes had lost their shine, dark circles under them. He wore long sleeves, which he usually didn't in his videos Jack had noticed. It made Jack's heart hurt even more, knowing what he hid beneath them.  
Thanks to the video, Jack was informed that Mark had gone to live with his parents after loosing his job, which he had needed back then, since YouTube hadn't been enough to live off of. He would take a break from videos until he felt better, saying that he wasn't in a good place right now.

Once the video was over, Jack leaned back into his chair. Mark had had pink hair back then. It looked utterly adorable on him, but Jack couldn't focus on that. He worried about Mark, and what had happened to him. He didn't know what happened between living with his parents to living with his friends, but Jack worried. So much had happened to Mark, the worst being the abusive cheating boyfriend, and it had left such a toll on Mark.  
Jack really wanted Mark to be happy again. He wanted to help him through this, to make many new memories, that would outweigh the bad ones. But he wasn't sure if Mark wanted that, if he wanted Jack's help. Maybe it would be impossible to help Mark?...  
Jack violently shook his head, no! He could help Mark, his friends could help Mark! It was never impossible to help someone. It could be very hard, but if Mark wanted help, and would let others help him, then it was more than possible. Jack couldn't start thinking negatively about it.

Jack began recording then, with new found determination. He would keep in touch with Mark and make sure that he was alright, just like he'd stay in touch with the Grumps as well. He didn't want to have to see Mark on that bridge again, he didn't want to see him anywhere near death again. And even though it would be a hard task to do, Jack was ready for it. He loved Mark, and he'd try and let him see that as well, even if he couldn't tell him.  
Once recording was done, Jack texted Mark. He was used to spending his time with the other, whenever he wasn't recording or out, and he was curious what Mark was doing. Thankfully Mark responded rather quickly, and the two texted for at least an hour.  
Mark told Jack that he was thinking about trying to record games again, there were many he hadn't played yet and wanted to, and maybe it would really help him. He still had most of his subscribers, who hadn't left him or gathered over time in the hopes that Mark would come back. And Jack knew, having read through comments under Mark's latest video, that the community he had had was very supportive of him. So Jack encouraged him, and they talked a little more about YouTube and games.

The next few days went exactly like that. Jack spend most of his time at home, like usual, recording and uploading two videos a day. He texted with Mark, who hadn't revived his channel yet, and he texted with the Grumps. He texted with his other friends as well of course, telling Felix all about what he had gone through in the last months. Felix was of course very interested, so the conversations with him lasted hours, just to explain everything.  
Now Jack was just arriving at the office building, where the Grumps had their recording studio. He found his way thankfully through the hallways, only once getting lost and having to text Arin, before he stood in front of the door and knocked.  
He was greeted by Suzy, who smiled at him and let him inside. The couch was already set up, Arin and Dan sitting there and looking through games. Jack joined them, being greeted enthusiastically, and helped pick out some game to play.

Jack stayed with the Grumps for a few hours, not only recording with Dan and Arin, but also once with Brian and with Barry. They had lots of fun, and decided to record one of the console games for Jack's channel. Jack chose UNO for that, which was probably the most fun game they had played together. While the first round only lasted about twenty minutes, was the second one so long that Jack would have to edit it a lot, to shorten it.  
Since the Grumps had ordered take-out, Jack decided to stay for dinner, talking casually with them. When his phone vibrated with a new notification, he curiously pulled it out to check. Comments on his videos wouldn't make a notable notification, he had turned that off, but text messages or new videos from subscribed channels would do that still.

"Holy shit", Jack breathed out, seeing what the notification is. Of course, that got the attention of Dan, who was sitting right next to him.  
"What is it dude?", he asked, trying to look on Jack's phone. He had already tapped on it though, and right now the YouTube app was opening.  
"Mark made a video!", he exclaimed, which caused Arin to look towards him as well. He stood up, plopping down next to Jack, so that all three men could watch on Jack's phone.  
The video soon loaded, it was a vlog. Not very long, but a video nonetheless. The face of a red-haired Mark appeared, smiling softly.  
 _"Hello everybody! My name is Markiplier"_ , his usual intro rang out, though with less enthusiasm as if he were playing a game. Mark went on to explain where he'd been, saying he had troubles with jobs and where to stay, and that the relationship he had had in the past had caused quite a few troubles as well. Now everything was more or less alright, he admitted to not be perfectly healthy, but that he was much better than before. He mentioned his friends, the Grumps, and also his newest friend and biggest help, Jack. With a promise to starting his channel again with gameplay videos, he ended the video with a smile and a wave.

The three men on the couch were in awe, Jack being the first to break out into a bright grin. He cheered for Mark, glad that he would be back online and have something to do in his time. The Grumps soon joined Jack's happiness, and the three of them started talking about it.  
Jack told them he had encouraged Mark to start again, so that he had something to do again and could take his mind off of things with games, while also gaining support by his community. He had seen in the comments of various videos that Mark was loved by his fans, and that he cared about them as well.  
When the take-out arrived and everyone gathered for once, the news of Mark having uploaded a video quickly got to everyone, and the topic stayed mostly on him. Jack could tell he probably knew the most about what had happened to Mark in the past, at least more in detail then the rest. It made him feel a little special, and he was glad that Mark had trusted him like that.

Another one or two hours later, Jack was back at home. He decided to leave a positive comment on Mark's video, and texted him. Mark seemed unsure if it was a good idea, afraid of negativity and haters, but Jack tried his best to reassure him that everything would be alright. He'd be there for him and he was always welcome in his home.  
Mark eventually calmed down and decided to trust Jack's words, and they went on to chat about different things, what they were doing, had done, about Jack's day at the Grumps. Jack asked about how Mark was doing, living alone again, and if he should visit him. Mark replied that he was doing okay, though Jack had the feeling Mark also felt a little lonely. But Mark didn't say anything about that, so Jack didn't pry. He didn't want to make Mark feel worse than he was..

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm seriously doubting I'll write the tenth chapter  
> Y'all gotta deal with this being the almost last chapter then! NYahahaha  
> So, Mark is back to making videos, and everything seems great!  
> Great! :Dc


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry I forgot to update

He was here again. He _had_ to be here again. Jack was running, the rain hitting him harshly in the face. He was terrified, panic flowing through his veins. The fallen leafs were making the ground firmer, his shoes not sticking to the mud as badly. It was cold, the rain only making it colder, but Jack ignored it. He ignored everything. He had to find him, he had to stop him. He couldn't loose him, not before telling him. Not before he knew.

Mark hadn't been texting back in a few days. He hadn't talked to Jack or the Grumps, and he hadn't uploaded a video to explain either. He didn't upload all that much, three to four times a week, depending on how he felt even less. But he usually always texted back when Jack messaged him, or the Grumps. Concerned, Jack had driven to Mark's apartment, to check on him.   
Arriving there, Jack saw Mark's motorcycle. So he hopefully was still home at least. Jack was glad he had gotten the spare key to Mark's apartment earlier in the week, a few days before Mark stopped responding to everything. So he rushed inside and up the elevator, running to Mark's door. He knocked, but when he got no reply whatsoever after a few minutes, he unlocked the door with his key and went inside.  
He called out, panic slowly filling his veins. There was no response. Jack checked every room, searching for Mark, but found nothing. Only when he stood back in the hall, looking around once more to think about where Mark could be, did he see a note attached to the front door. So that it would only be seen when you were to leave.

Jack immediately went to it, taking it off the door and reading over it. His eyes widened and his breath hitched, panic fully setting into his bones, before he was already running out of the apartment, the note fluttering to the ground and the door falling shut.

_I'm sorry Jack  
But I'm so, so tired_

The rain hit him hard in the face, blurring his sight, but Jack could spot the bridge ahead of him. The one where he had first found Mark, where he had stopped Mark once before. It was the first place Jack could think of where Mark would go to, the _only_ place Jack could think of. He was shaking, tears had already run over his cheeks and mixed with the rain.  
His steps slowed down, once he reached the bridge. Mark was here. He was there, standing on the bridge, looking out over the water beneath. It was almost like the first time they had stood here together, the only difference being the rain that fell merciless onto the two, and that the moon was barely shining through the dark clouds.

"Mark", Jack almost _chocked_ out, relief flooding him, seeing Mark alive, that he still had a chance to save him. Mark didn't move upon hearing Jack, didn't acknowledge that he was there. But Jack knew he had heard him. "Mark, please. Don't-"  
"Don't what?", Mark interrupted Jack, his voice cold, but also kind of quiet. "Don't jump? Don't kill yourself?", he muttered, like it didn't matter. And it didn't, not to him.  
"I tried Jack, I tried... so hard", he continued, and Jack stayed silent, listening to Mark with fear still filling him. "I can't- I can't fight it anymore. It's so hard, Jack... and... and I'm so tired".  
Mark was crying, Jack realized. He could hear it in his voice, he saw his shoulders shaking. Mark hugged himself, shaking his head, causing water droplets to fly from his hair.  
"Mark...", Jack mumbled, taking a step closer to Mark, which he didn't notice. He had his back turned to Jack still.  
"I'll just disappoint everyone. I- I always do. I'm... I'm weak. I'm broken, and no one- no one would... could ever be able to... to love me, like this", Mark continued talking, now turning around to Jack. His gaze was full of sadness, and Mark looked so incredibly broken right there.

"Mark I...", Jack started, but trailed off. He.. he couldn't tell him, he didn't know if that would help at all. He was scared of what would happen, he was scared to admit his feelings out loud.  
"It's okay", Mark said, a sad smile on his face. He sniffed, looking down at Jack. "I won't be a bother anymore... I... I won't be a problem to you anymore".  
Mark took a small step back, if he lost his balance now, if he shuffled back any more, he would fall. Jack stepped forward in response, terrified that he'd loose Mark.  
"No! No, Mark wait, let me- let me say something", Jack's breathing was short, his panic painfully obvious. But Mark waited, his smile falling like his gaze. He waited for Jack to talk.

"Mark I... I love you", Jack finally admitted. Mark looked sharply up, eyes finding Jack's. He was smiling calmly at Mark, shivering from the cold, but otherwise looking calm.  
"I've fallen fer ya a long time ago... an' I was scared, scared ta admit it. I wasn't sure what would happen if I told ya, an' I'm not sure how you will react, but... I needed ta tell ya", Jack rubbed at his eyes, with his wet jacket sleeves. He was tearing up again, but he needed to stay strong, for Mark.  
"You... y-you...", Mark was at a loss for words, but he let his gaze fall again, gathering his thoughts. Then, he laughed. It was soft and dry, lacking any humour.  
"You don't need to lie to me Jack", he said, shaking his head. He looked back up, back to Jack, a pained smile on his face. "I'm broken. If- if you were to love me... I'd- I'd just hurt you".

"Yer not broken Mark. Yes ya have problems an' flaws, an' yer havin' a hard time livin'. But I love you. I love you exactly how ya are, an' we can get through this together", Jack responded, taking another step closer to Mark, who thankfully didn't move.  
"I want ta help ya Mark. I want ta be by yer side, and help ya through everythin' that burdens ya. Yer the best thing that happened ta me Mark", Jack continued, taking another small step forward. He reached out a hand, offering it to Mark to take.  
"Please, don't leave me. Step down. We'll get through this together, an' I'll be there for the whole way, an' stayin' afterwards". Jack smiled at Mark, he was scared that Mark wouldn't listen to him, but he hoped that Mark would take his hand and step down.

They looked at each other for a while, where the only sound was the rain falling against the stone bridge, the rushing of the water below them, and their quiet breathing. And then, finally, Mark took a step forward. Towards Jack. Towards safety.  
Once more, Mark took Jack's offered hand and let himself be pulled down, got pulled into Jack's arms again. And like the first time they had been here, Mark clung to Jack, sobs breaking free and rocking his body. The both of them sunk to the ground, both already drenched anyways. Jack held Mark close to himself, rubbing his back, while Mark cried into Jack's shoulder, chocking out quiet apologies.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M SO DISTRACTED BY MY NEW TUMBLR BLOG I'M SORRY FOR EVERYONE READING MY FICS  
> But yeah, this is the "for now" ending, because I still haven't written the tenth chapter.  
> It was only supposed to show how everything turned out anyways, and be big and happy and show how Mark has to deal with less and less, but still has some things that other's need to be careful of  
> But yeah, I HAD TO MAKE THIS ANGSTY AGAIN SORRY NOT SORRY :D  
> I hope you enjoyed the fic! I loved writing it!
> 
> A word for the ones reading my other stuff:  
> Like I said, I'm _incredibly_ distracted by my new tumblr blog, because it's rather active and I'm writing a lot there. So yeah, practically everything is on hold, because I can't get my motivation up to write anything, I even forgot to update this orz  
>  I hope I won't abandon "Static" though, because I love that fic, even though it'll be soon done as well (which is a reason I definitely _should_ continue it) but yeah. Just shout at me somewhere to remind me


End file.
